YOU MADE ME DO THIS: ‘I want to surrender this passion that i’ve lost…”
Do you know what it feels like to march your death? I do.
Basically,it is something that simply isn’t done because there’s an unspoken rule about not doing it.I don’t learn about love the same way i learn that it’s bad to steal or it’s wrong to lie.
This kind of love is so much subtler,maybe because it doesn’t seem to come with any of the threats or punishments i know will come after i break a rule.Or does it?Maybe my experience will guide you to takes the lid off frowned upon love– the relationship you’re not supposed to have.but nobody ever really talks to you about.
I was thrilled when Jayson began visiting me.Every time i see him thoroughly charmed standing, smiling and waiting for me,I couldn’t imagine saying no when he asked me out.I was trying to convinced myself to get out of the relationship,but my thinking was, ‘Hey, I’m happy and not hurting anyone,so why should I give it up?And for a long time,I really was happy.I had never felt so special in my life.I was so terribly stubborn about it,that after while i just gave up on it.
The truth behind it is you face to get physically intimate, whether or not,you’re ready for that.But the pressure is definitely more intense since there’s just no getting out of it.
Also,having wildly different priorities means that you won’t see eye to eye.I didn’t get to see him as much as i liked.
He was always telling me not to worry,but getting involved with Jayson has moral and emotional dimensions that make these things pale in comparison.Seeing this way had been so painful and confusing for me.
My relationship with Jayson soured as his promises of getting in touch wither away.The whole time,I’m trying to pretend it’s a normal boyfriend-girlfriend relationship when it’s not.I keep trying to ignore my stupidity,but it’s emotionally draining.Playing a relationship is fun at first,but I quit,eventually.I wanted a real boyfriend,not this in-between pretend thing.
"Alienated.Ready to give up? Emotionally drained.Playing stupid.Is that what you imagined yourself growing up to be?Why,when there are so many things you can be?I wouldn’t have put myself in that situation."
This stupid love is a much bigger danger,a relationship that limits me.
Remember this: You’re at a period in your life when you’re about to take off and find your own unique personality–don’t let anything get in the way of what will be some of the best years of your life.So before reaching for that forbidden fruit,stop and think a long.long while.You might be giving up something sweeter.
How i wish,i can upload a video of my gOodbyE sOng iN hEre…
Leave the pieces by the wreckers.
Artist/Band: Wreckers
Lyrics for Song: Leave The Pieces
Lyrics for Album: Stand Still, Look Pretty
You’re not sure that you love me
But you’re not sure enough to let me go
Baby it ain’t fair you know
To just keep me hangin’ ’round
You say you don’t wanna hurt me
Don’t wanna to see my tears
So why are you still standing here
Just watching me drown?
[Chorus]
And it’s alright, yeah I’ll be fine
Don’t worry ’bout this heart of mine
Just take your love and hit the road
There’s nothing you can do or say
You’re gonna break my heart anyway
So just leave the pieces when you go
Now you can drag out the heartache
Baby you can make it quick
Really get it over with
And just let me move on
Don’t concern yourself
With this mess you’ve left for me
I can clean it up, you see
Just as long as you’re gone
[Chorus]
You not making up your mind
Is killing me and wasting time
I need so much more than that
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah
[Chorus]
Leave the pieces when you go
Oh yeah
Leave the pieces when you go
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah,
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah,
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah,
Leave the pieces when you go
Kung wala ka nang gustong sabihin
Wag ka nang tumingin ng ganyan
Kung bukas,ako’y kalilimutan
Sana naman ngayo’y di mo na isipin ako’y tawagan
[refrain]
At habang may panahon,
Wag na nating hintayin
Na mahalin pa
At masakit na’ng damdamin
[chorus]
Ang pag-alis ng iyong liwanag
Na gumising sa mahabang ngiti
Ika’y langit ngunit ang paglisan ay di kayanin pa
Ang pag-alis
"Kung wala ka nang gustong marinig
Ako’y aalis at manahimik
Ang kahapon na nais kong limutin
Sana naman huwag nang manumbalik at bigyang pansin"
[repeat refrain]
[repeat chorus]
